Why You Stay in a Relationship That’s Overstayed Its Welcome
These hard truths keep you staying for the wrong reasons.
Most of us do not jump headfirst into a relationship with the assumption that it is time-limited. We aren’t using one relationship to get over another or for ego validation. The reality is that if we are choosing a relationship for the wrong reasons, sooner or later what attracted us to that relationship will become the reason(s) we end up leaving. We know on an instinctual and subconscious level that if our motivations for wanting a relationship are not healthy, there is zero probability that we will be authentically happy or that the relationship can be sustainable.
Choosing a relationship for the wrong reasons is usually the exception — not the rule — when it comes to wanting to have someone in our lives with which to share intimacy and an authentic bond. No, the “perfect” relationship does not exist. And, no, we do not need to spend decades in therapy unpacking our attachment insecurities before getting (or staying) in a committed and healthy relationship. However, if our ultimate goal is to find a high caliber partner and sustainable partnership, we owe it to ourselves to heal our core wounds and to take a deep dive into our early conditioning before choosing someone to be with.