Just because they’re micro behaviors, doesn’t make them any less toxic. — The word “narcissism” has been tossed around interchangeably with Narcissistic Personality Disorder on blog posts and social media as being synonymous. The fact is, they’re not. Simply put: this is how people get incorrectly labeled and misdiagnosed who otherwise don’t meet the criteria for the disorder. …

Understanding why is what helps you grow, if you let it. — It’s not my intention to trigger anyone. Writing this triggered a lot for me too, and dug up some painful memories. Please understand that some topics can’t be sugarcoated, or dumbed-down because they wind up losing their purpose. Please let this be a warning for some who may have experienced…

Understanding & fully addressing these steps can foster our healing — “Trigger” Warning: While it is my intention to educate and inform others of the complexities of trauma, especially how childhood trauma can affect our adult lives, it is not my intention to emotionally “trigger” anyone who may be experiencing the effects of complicated grief or complex trauma. …

Spotting the patterns of dysfunction that we “chase” in our relationships — For some, being hardwired and stuck in a proverbial stress response cycle can desensitize them to chaos or conflict. They may feel numb to drama as they scroll through their social media or may be emotionally disconnected from what’s trending in the news. Chaos or conflict may be seen as…

The a-ha! moments come slow & steady after trauma — No one wants to hear the word ‘breakdown’. It’s riddled with stigma, assumptions, and misinformation. If you tell someone you had a ‘breakdown’ outside of trusted family or your therapist, watch how fast people start side-stepping and finding excuses as to why they haven’t called or stopped by to say…

Why anger is a necessary part of healing from childhood trauma — Elisabeth Kübler-Ross was a psychiatrist who extensively studied death and dying (grief). She discovered that each of these people went through the same stages of grieving, even if they experienced them differently. This began her career researching grief, in which she eventually coined 5 stages: denial, depression, anger, bargaining, and…

These lead to a pattern of self-betrayal in our relationships — Our patterns, cycles, and inter-generational trauma often tell a different story from the one we tell ourselves. Many of us struggle to believe it, and some may outright deny it, but how we see ourselves today is a direct result of our earliest lived experiences. By the time we’re adults…

Learning how to increase our mind/body connection after trauma — “Being traumatized means continuing to organize your life as if the trauma were still going on — unchanged and immutable — as every new encounter or event is contaminated by the past.” — Bessel van der Kolk How we attach to others is not “just” how we approach our relationships…

Understanding trauma-based anxiety and how it affects us — It’s tough to explain to people what anxiety feels like. …